Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Pause

So, Robyn and I spent a lot of time yesterday talking about Newtown, CT and if we should talk about it on the blog and what to say when we don't know what to say...I don't know...neither of us do...but I guess it feels like maybe we should pause for a day.

Before I begin I should say that I'm not good at being sad-- or maybe I'm too good at being sad.  I have a hard time with sad things, they are often all consuming and I can stew and worry long after a normal person would have resolved the issue.

As I said, Robyn and I have talked about the horrible events that took place last Friday. We've feel sad and sickened and worried and all the emotions that go through a parent's mind after such an event, as well as those that go through the mind of an elementary teacher. 

I remember emergency drills when I taught school in Baltimore and preparing for the unimaginable and deciding where was the safest place for the kids to hide if danger came to our building.  I'm sure this goes without saying, but I am eternally grateful that we only had drills for this situation and never had to put them into place. 

Like all of you. my heart aches for those affected by this tragedy and other senseless acts of violence.  This kind of thing scares me. I mean really scares me. It makes me not want to send my children to school (or go to the mall or the movie theatre.) It makes me want to stay inside and hug my family close and never see or experience pain and sadness.  But as people tell me each time I'm afraid, "You can't be scared."

So, I'm doing my best not be scared.  I'm doing my best to remember that there is a lot of good wonderful things in this world, things that I want my children to see and enjoy. I'm going to try not be afraid.  I'm going to be more thankful for the time I have with the people I love and more thankful for the other caring adults in my childrens' lives who help to nurture and protect them.

I can only assume, as tends to happen in our country, that this event will somehow turn into a political agenda with both sides arguing and refusing to see the other point of view on how to best prevent this in the future.  I hope activists and politicians and reporters and facebookers will try and remember what the teachers and children at Sandy Hook Elementary were surely learning every day: cooperation, kindness, and compassion. That's what we all want and deserve, we ought to show it to one another as well.  Let's honor them and their memory in a positive way by coming together and making things better instead of fighting about whose side is right.  As long as things like this keep happening, neither side is right.      
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